1 00:00:03,300 --> 00:00:06,600 (Taskmaster theme tune) 2 00:00:26,800 --> 00:00:29,100 (Applause) 3 00:00:33,800 --> 00:00:35,100 - Hello! 4 00:00:35,900 --> 00:00:38,700 Welcome, one and all 5 00:00:39,400 --> 00:00:42,200 to episode three of Taskmaster. 6 00:00:42,300 --> 00:00:44,300 Five comedians are at war with each other, 7 00:00:44,300 --> 00:00:48,000 all in a bid to get their mucky mitts on this finely crafted face cup. 8 00:00:48,100 --> 00:00:51,600 So, let's marvel once more at their wildly difference levels 9 00:00:51,600 --> 00:00:53,500 of competence and enthusiasm. 10 00:00:53,600 --> 00:00:55,400 And say a big hello to: 11 00:00:55,400 --> 00:00:56,700 David Baddiel 12 00:00:58,000 --> 00:00:59,500 Ed Gamble 13 00:00:59,900 --> 00:01:01,500 Jo Brand 14 00:01:01,700 --> 00:01:03,200 Katy Wix 15 00:01:03,200 --> 00:01:05,600 and Rose Matafeo. 16 00:01:05,700 --> 00:01:07,200 (Cheering and applause) 17 00:01:07,400 --> 00:01:09,400 And next to me is a young man who 18 00:01:09,400 --> 00:01:11,500 nibbles and scurries his way through life, 19 00:01:11,600 --> 00:01:13,500 like a long, human rat. 20 00:01:14,000 --> 00:01:17,100 It's little Alex Horne! 21 00:01:17,300 --> 00:01:19,000 (Applause) 22 00:01:20,200 --> 00:01:21,700 Hello Alex. - Hello 23 00:01:21,800 --> 00:01:22,800 - What's new? 24 00:01:22,800 --> 00:01:24,300 - Nothing, I've just got my, um 25 00:01:24,400 --> 00:01:27,100 my mantra running through my head as I normally do, so I feel pretty good. 26 00:01:27,100 --> 00:01:28,200 - Got a new mantra have you? 27 00:01:28,200 --> 00:01:30,200 - Absoluta Pulsis Voluptatem. 28 00:01:30,200 --> 00:01:32,700 - What is it? - Absoluta Pulsis Voluptatem. 29 00:01:32,800 --> 00:01:34,600 Always. Just round and round. 30 00:01:34,600 --> 00:01:35,600 - Okay, what does that mean? 31 00:01:35,600 --> 00:01:37,300 - Well, I got it-- I mean I always have it with me as well. 32 00:01:37,300 --> 00:01:39,800 Absoluta Pulsis Voluptatem. Always. 33 00:01:39,900 --> 00:01:41,900 Absoluta Pulsis Voluptatem. 34 00:01:41,900 --> 00:01:44,400 - And, um, before we get on with the show, what does that mean? 35 00:01:44,500 --> 00:01:47,200 - It's just a phrase, just a phrase I saw written down, and I thought, "That is me." 36 00:01:47,200 --> 00:01:48,300 - Yep, what is it? 37 00:01:48,700 --> 00:01:50,600 - It means "Sheer driving pleasure." 38 00:01:51,100 --> 00:01:53,000 (Laughter) 39 00:01:53,700 --> 00:01:54,900 From the BMW advert. 40 00:01:54,900 --> 00:01:55,900 - Yeah, yeah yeah. 41 00:01:56,400 --> 00:01:58,300 And I don't know how to respond. 42 00:01:59,200 --> 00:02:01,700 - You don't have to. Just concentrate on the 'Sheer driving pleasure.' 43 00:02:02,200 --> 00:02:05,000 (Laughter and applause) 44 00:02:07,900 --> 00:02:10,800 - Good, let's crack on. Let's have the prize task, please. 45 00:02:10,800 --> 00:02:11,700 - Okay, good show. 46 00:02:11,700 --> 00:02:15,800 And this week, it's all about having the weirdest wooden thing. 47 00:02:16,900 --> 00:02:18,800 That's what you call me, and Iike it. 48 00:02:20,000 --> 00:02:22,600 You will judge one of their wooden things, the weirdest 49 00:02:22,600 --> 00:02:25,100 and give its owner five points and at the end of the episode the overall winner 50 00:02:25,100 --> 00:02:26,900 will ride home with big wood. 51 00:02:27,000 --> 00:02:28,000 - Yes, please. 52 00:02:28,300 --> 00:02:30,000 Let's start with my little friend Ed Gamble. 53 00:02:30,000 --> 00:02:33,900 - I've brought something that my father brought me back from Switzerland 54 00:02:33,900 --> 00:02:35,800 A little souvenir. There it is. 55 00:02:37,900 --> 00:02:39,800 (Laughter) 56 00:02:40,700 --> 00:02:42,400 It's a Tschaggatta demon. 57 00:02:42,400 --> 00:02:45,400 But the hair and teeth you see there, are human. 58 00:02:45,800 --> 00:02:47,700 (Audience groans) 59 00:02:47,900 --> 00:02:50,000 - Is the hair from a dead person? 60 00:02:50,000 --> 00:02:52,500 - Doesn't-- You don't need to be dead, you can have a little hair cut. 61 00:02:52,500 --> 00:02:53,800 - But did your dad kill someone? 62 00:02:55,200 --> 00:02:58,800 - As far as I'm aware, my dad did not kill anyone for the hair, David. 63 00:02:59,000 --> 00:03:00,800 - Horrendous, good. 64 00:03:01,000 --> 00:03:03,800 Jo, what is your weird wooden thing? 65 00:03:03,900 --> 00:03:07,100 - It's a thing that my daughter made, in year seven. 66 00:03:07,200 --> 00:03:08,200 - Here it is. 67 00:03:10,600 --> 00:03:14,300 - I like to call it 'The President Trump Sausage Grabber.' 68 00:03:15,100 --> 00:03:16,200 - Does she know you brought this? 69 00:03:16,200 --> 00:03:19,000 'Cause if she's watching now she's in her mid thirties, isn't she? 70 00:03:19,100 --> 00:03:20,500 - How dare you. 71 00:03:20,600 --> 00:03:22,500 (Laughter) 72 00:03:24,500 --> 00:03:26,000 She's 61. 73 00:03:27,600 --> 00:03:29,900 - It's absolutely shit, well done. 74 00:03:30,200 --> 00:03:31,400 Rose. - Yep. 75 00:03:31,400 --> 00:03:33,100 - Have you got wood? Have you got weird wood? 76 00:03:33,100 --> 00:03:34,900 - Yeah, I've got a weird man... 77 00:03:35,500 --> 00:03:36,500 carving. 78 00:03:36,500 --> 00:03:37,300 - There it is. 79 00:03:37,700 --> 00:03:38,500 - Oh, wow. 80 00:03:38,600 --> 00:03:39,900 - Oh God, I hate it. 81 00:03:40,000 --> 00:03:41,800 - Yeah, it's weird isn't is? 82 00:03:41,800 --> 00:03:43,800 It came all the way from Colorado. 83 00:03:43,900 --> 00:03:46,100 It cost 40 US dollars. 84 00:03:46,300 --> 00:03:48,000 - What do you think his secrets might be? 85 00:03:49,100 --> 00:03:51,000 - I recon he's someone looking for treasure. 86 00:03:51,000 --> 00:03:52,800 His soul has been captured in a carving. 87 00:03:52,800 --> 00:03:54,200 - Yep. - Your classic story. 88 00:03:54,300 --> 00:03:55,800 (Laughter) 89 00:03:56,100 --> 00:03:59,600 - Now then David, let's get to the good stuff. 90 00:04:00,600 --> 00:04:03,500 - My brother spent ages and ages creating something 91 00:04:03,600 --> 00:04:06,500 in woodwork and poured his heart and soul into it, I remember. 92 00:04:06,700 --> 00:04:08,100 And we kept it, 93 00:04:08,100 --> 00:04:12,300 as an ornament, on our shelves for many years. 94 00:04:12,500 --> 00:04:13,900 And this was it. 95 00:04:13,900 --> 00:04:14,900 - There it is. 96 00:04:15,100 --> 00:04:17,000 (Laughter) 97 00:04:21,100 --> 00:04:22,900 - What amazes me about it is 98 00:04:23,000 --> 00:04:25,200 he found that in our back garden, 99 00:04:25,200 --> 00:04:26,600 he varnished it, 100 00:04:26,700 --> 00:04:28,400 and he got a mark for that. 101 00:04:28,400 --> 00:04:30,300 - What's his name? - His name is Ivor. 102 00:04:30,300 --> 00:04:32,500 - It's absolutely shit, Ivor. 103 00:04:32,500 --> 00:04:33,900 - It's so shit. 104 00:04:34,400 --> 00:04:37,400 - Katy, you're up against some stiff competition here. 105 00:04:37,500 --> 00:04:39,900 - Can we see it first? And then maybe I'll explain how I-- 106 00:04:39,900 --> 00:04:41,500 - You sure you're ready? - --found it. Yeah, I'm ready. 107 00:04:41,700 --> 00:04:42,900 - Good luck everyone. Here we go. 108 00:04:43,100 --> 00:04:44,700 (Laughter) 109 00:04:47,800 --> 00:04:48,600 - Yeah. 110 00:04:49,700 --> 00:04:52,700 So my friend's dad imports them and-- 111 00:04:53,000 --> 00:04:56,900 - I'm really, I'm really glad that's where that sentence went. 112 00:04:58,200 --> 00:05:00,300 - 'Cause always, when I'm round her house 113 00:05:00,800 --> 00:05:02,900 he's always, like, showing them to me. 114 00:05:02,900 --> 00:05:03,900 - Is he? 115 00:05:05,300 --> 00:05:07,600 - But he did gift it to me, so that was nice. 116 00:05:07,600 --> 00:05:08,800 - What's RRP on this? 117 00:05:08,800 --> 00:05:11,300 - I mean I didn't ask, I just wanted to get out of there, if I'm honest. 118 00:05:11,500 --> 00:05:13,400 (Laughter) 119 00:05:13,900 --> 00:05:15,900 He actually offered to buy me a motorbike once. 120 00:05:15,900 --> 00:05:17,200 It's quite a weird relationship. 121 00:05:18,300 --> 00:05:19,900 - He gave you that 122 00:05:19,900 --> 00:05:22,300 He paused, and he went 123 00:05:22,800 --> 00:05:24,200 "Can I buy you a motorbike?" 124 00:05:24,200 --> 00:05:25,600 (Laughter) 125 00:05:26,200 --> 00:05:29,200 - I mean, lots of phalluses like that, they are respected around the world. 126 00:05:29,200 --> 00:05:31,600 In Bhutan they ward off demons. 127 00:05:31,700 --> 00:05:33,600 You brought a demon in. - Oh, you've got some facts, sorry. 128 00:05:33,600 --> 00:05:35,900 - Well it's not-- I just Googled 'penis'... 129 00:05:37,500 --> 00:05:39,200 In South Korea, there's a penis park. 130 00:05:39,200 --> 00:05:41,000 It's a park where everything's shaped like a penis. 131 00:05:42,800 --> 00:05:45,000 Then it got mucky. Then it got muckier and muckier. 132 00:05:45,000 --> 00:05:45,800 - Okay. 133 00:05:46,500 --> 00:05:47,800 Tell us a couple of mucky things. 134 00:05:47,800 --> 00:05:48,400 - Mucky. 135 00:05:49,000 --> 00:05:51,200 - Well I thought... Well, in Iceland there's a penis museum 136 00:05:51,200 --> 00:05:53,900 where they've got a penis from every mammal that's native to Iceland. 137 00:05:53,900 --> 00:05:55,800 - Yeah, I've seen pictures, it's really sickening. 138 00:05:55,800 --> 00:05:57,400 - It is sickening isn't it? - Yeah, yeah. 139 00:05:57,400 --> 00:05:59,300 - Because they've really been pulled out at the root. 140 00:05:59,500 --> 00:06:01,300 (Audience groans) 141 00:06:02,700 --> 00:06:04,500 - Can you replant them like bulbs? 142 00:06:04,600 --> 00:06:05,900 (Laughter) 143 00:06:06,500 --> 00:06:07,700 - Judgement time. 144 00:06:07,700 --> 00:06:08,900 - Okay 145 00:06:08,900 --> 00:06:11,300 - Do you want to start at one point? The fifth place person. 146 00:06:11,400 --> 00:06:13,800 - Yes, and I feel mean doing it, but 147 00:06:13,900 --> 00:06:17,100 I think that Jo's daughter will have progressed 148 00:06:17,400 --> 00:06:19,000 since she made that, in life. 149 00:06:19,000 --> 00:06:21,000 - Well how cruel, 'cause she hasn't. 150 00:06:21,200 --> 00:06:22,900 (Laughter) 151 00:06:23,300 --> 00:06:24,400 - Okay one point for Jo Brand. 152 00:06:24,400 --> 00:06:27,300 - I didn't know enough of the backstory of the Colorado man, 153 00:06:27,300 --> 00:06:28,800 so I'm giving Rose two points. 154 00:06:28,800 --> 00:06:30,400 - Yeah, it was just cheeky wasn't it. Fair enough. 155 00:06:30,700 --> 00:06:33,600 - Three points 'cause it had real hair, 156 00:06:33,700 --> 00:06:34,800 Ed Gamble 157 00:06:35,400 --> 00:06:38,700 - So, it's three points because it was too weird for a weird task? 158 00:06:40,000 --> 00:06:43,100 - You've got a point, but something about your tone I didn't enjoy. 159 00:06:44,000 --> 00:06:47,100 - Sticking with three? - I'm gonna leave you exactly where you are. 160 00:06:47,500 --> 00:06:49,000 There's not much to separate the other-- 161 00:06:49,000 --> 00:06:52,200 Well there's... There's a lot separating the other two. 162 00:06:52,200 --> 00:06:53,900 - The stick and the dick? - The stick and the dick. 163 00:06:54,000 --> 00:06:55,900 (Laughter) 164 00:07:00,200 --> 00:07:02,900 As so often in life I do, I'm gonna put dick in second place. 165 00:07:02,900 --> 00:07:03,900 - Awwww. 166 00:07:04,500 --> 00:07:06,300 - I just feel sorry for David's brother. 167 00:07:06,300 --> 00:07:08,800 I mean he deserves something in life. 168 00:07:08,900 --> 00:07:09,900 Five points. 169 00:07:10,100 --> 00:07:12,100 (Cheering and applause) 170 00:07:13,500 --> 00:07:16,500 Right, come on then, pretend to press play on your iPad. 171 00:07:16,700 --> 00:07:18,000 - It's not, it's not pretend. 172 00:07:18,000 --> 00:07:19,500 - It is pretend. - It's not pretend. 173 00:07:19,800 --> 00:07:22,400 (Taskmaster task music) 174 00:07:30,100 --> 00:07:31,400 - Hello. - It's only me. 175 00:07:31,400 --> 00:07:32,700 - Welcome to the manor. 176 00:07:32,700 --> 00:07:34,100 - Okay, thanks. - Don't sit down. 177 00:07:34,300 --> 00:07:36,100 Hello, welcome to the manor. 178 00:07:36,100 --> 00:07:36,900 - Ahhh. 179 00:07:36,900 --> 00:07:39,200 - Don't sit down. Welcome to the manor. 180 00:07:39,400 --> 00:07:40,600 Don't sit down. 181 00:07:40,600 --> 00:07:42,400 Please do a little walk to the spot. 182 00:07:42,400 --> 00:07:44,600 Please do a little walk to the spot. 183 00:07:44,700 --> 00:07:45,800 I like your little walk. 184 00:07:45,900 --> 00:07:46,800 I like your little walk. 185 00:07:46,800 --> 00:07:47,900 Whoops. Whoops. 186 00:07:47,900 --> 00:07:49,000 Whoops. Wh-whoops. 187 00:07:49,000 --> 00:07:50,400 You're looking really nice. - Thank you. 188 00:07:50,400 --> 00:07:51,400 You're looking really nice. 189 00:07:51,400 --> 00:07:54,200 Balls, and books and snooker. And the doctor. 190 00:07:54,200 --> 00:07:56,100 Shhhh. Shhhhh. Shhhhh. 191 00:07:56,100 --> 00:07:58,400 Are you ready? You look ready. I'm ready. 192 00:07:58,400 --> 00:08:00,900 Are you ready? You look ready. I'm ready, there's your task. 193 00:08:01,000 --> 00:08:02,800 You should open it as soon as I leave the room. 194 00:08:03,500 --> 00:08:04,800 - (Whispers) Is he okay? 195 00:08:05,100 --> 00:08:05,900 - What? 196 00:08:06,000 --> 00:08:07,900 - Ah, I feel like I should have listened. 197 00:08:09,200 --> 00:08:12,100 - "Go the the caravan. You must enter the caravan within two minutes 198 00:08:12,200 --> 00:08:14,200 of Alex entering the caravan." 199 00:08:14,400 --> 00:08:17,600 - "You must enter the caravan within two minutes of Alex entering the caravan." 200 00:08:18,900 --> 00:08:20,300 - Do I take anything? 201 00:08:20,400 --> 00:08:21,200 No. 202 00:08:21,300 --> 00:08:22,900 (Laughing) 203 00:08:24,700 --> 00:08:26,600 - Has he entered it now, then? 204 00:08:28,600 --> 00:08:29,500 - Hiya. 205 00:08:35,200 --> 00:08:36,900 - Hello? - Hello, it's me. 206 00:08:37,200 --> 00:08:38,800 - Hello. - How are you? 207 00:08:39,200 --> 00:08:41,000 - My fly has got caught on the table. 208 00:08:45,700 --> 00:08:47,200 - I know what I've done. 209 00:08:49,100 --> 00:08:50,400 - Do you want to open the task, Rose? 210 00:08:50,400 --> 00:08:51,300 - No. 211 00:08:53,200 --> 00:08:55,400 - "List all the things that were hanging from the wooden board in the lab. 212 00:08:55,400 --> 00:08:57,800 Also say the colour of the wooden board in the lab." 213 00:08:57,800 --> 00:08:59,300 - Oh, fucking hell. 214 00:09:00,600 --> 00:09:04,100 - "Also say the colour of the wooden board in the lab." 215 00:09:04,500 --> 00:09:06,500 - "Also say what Alex said to you in the lab." 216 00:09:06,700 --> 00:09:08,000 - "Most correct answers wins." 217 00:09:08,100 --> 00:09:10,600 - What an idiot. Why am I such an idiot? 218 00:09:10,700 --> 00:09:11,600 Oh my God. 219 00:09:11,600 --> 00:09:14,500 - "Most correct answers wins. You have three minutes, you must not leave the caravan." 220 00:09:15,300 --> 00:09:18,300 "Also your time starts now." Also's unnecessary there. 221 00:09:18,400 --> 00:09:20,200 (Laughter) 222 00:09:24,200 --> 00:09:26,400 (Applause) 223 00:09:29,100 --> 00:09:32,600 - There's a distinction forming between the two camps here, 224 00:09:32,800 --> 00:09:34,800 is that the two younger people, 225 00:09:34,900 --> 00:09:36,400 Ed and Rose, 226 00:09:36,400 --> 00:09:37,600 just run. 227 00:09:38,800 --> 00:09:40,500 And you were both like... 228 00:09:41,800 --> 00:09:44,600 - I don't think, I just read the task and it's like "get there quickly," 229 00:09:44,600 --> 00:09:47,000 and my brain just goes "Alright, go go go!" 230 00:09:47,200 --> 00:09:50,400 - Yeah, same. - David swanned over when he felt like it. 231 00:09:51,100 --> 00:09:53,900 And Jo simply couldn't give a fuck. 232 00:09:54,100 --> 00:09:55,500 (Laughter) 233 00:09:56,600 --> 00:09:59,200 So I'm afraid that's all we've got time for in part one. 234 00:09:59,200 --> 00:10:02,500 See you soon for an exciting new chapter in our lives. 235 00:10:02,800 --> 00:10:04,500 (Applause) 236 00:10:08,700 --> 00:10:10,800 (Applause) 237 00:10:12,600 --> 00:10:13,800 Hello again. 238 00:10:15,200 --> 00:10:17,500 It's Taskmaster and it's part two. 239 00:10:17,500 --> 00:10:19,200 Alex, please remind me 240 00:10:19,200 --> 00:10:21,300 and I mean, just me 241 00:10:21,300 --> 00:10:23,900 about the task taking place before the break. 242 00:10:23,900 --> 00:10:24,900 - Just you? 243 00:10:25,500 --> 00:10:27,800 Okay, well it was a bit of a memory test 244 00:10:28,400 --> 00:10:30,700 I hung, I hung some stuff from the, um 245 00:10:30,900 --> 00:10:33,500 I hung some stuff from the ceiling as well and then they had to come into the caravan, 246 00:10:33,800 --> 00:10:36,000 and to remember what the bits were. 247 00:10:36,100 --> 00:10:37,600 And they were hanging from a-- 248 00:10:37,600 --> 00:10:39,500 - And how do you think, um... 249 00:10:40,200 --> 00:10:41,600 (Laughter) 250 00:10:42,000 --> 00:10:44,600 I think that David's gonna do really well. 251 00:10:46,500 --> 00:10:49,200 I think that Katy's gonna do the best 252 00:10:49,200 --> 00:10:51,200 because I think still waters run deep. 253 00:10:52,900 --> 00:10:53,900 - Are you ready? 254 00:10:56,200 --> 00:10:59,100 Okay, we're gonna start off with an exasperated Ed, 255 00:10:59,100 --> 00:11:00,900 a riled Rose, and a Jo Brand 256 00:11:01,100 --> 00:11:03,500 who was last seen pacing about outside the caravan. 257 00:11:04,600 --> 00:11:05,400 Here we go. 258 00:11:05,600 --> 00:11:07,000 - Oh my God, okay. 259 00:11:07,000 --> 00:11:10,100 There was some hanging rope, I think there was a paper plane. 260 00:11:10,900 --> 00:11:12,500 - There was like, a water pistol. 261 00:11:13,100 --> 00:11:14,800 Rope, there was like, some rope. 262 00:11:14,800 --> 00:11:16,400 - You said "Welcome to the manor." 263 00:11:17,400 --> 00:11:20,100 I think there was like, a ball, that looked a bit like a planet. 264 00:11:21,000 --> 00:11:23,000 Don't look at me like that, Horne. 265 00:11:25,500 --> 00:11:27,200 (Audience laughter) 266 00:11:31,200 --> 00:11:34,300 - Whaaaaa! No, I'm such a dumbass. 267 00:11:34,400 --> 00:11:35,500 Why didn't I? 268 00:11:35,500 --> 00:11:37,300 - You okay, Rose? - No. 269 00:11:37,400 --> 00:11:38,400 - Are you cross? 270 00:11:38,400 --> 00:11:39,900 - I'm cross with myself. 271 00:11:40,100 --> 00:11:43,000 Because of course the task isn't going to be "Run to the caravan." 272 00:11:43,200 --> 00:11:45,200 - No. I haven't been here for two minutes yet. 273 00:11:45,300 --> 00:11:46,900 You could still be in there. - Yeah. 274 00:11:48,800 --> 00:11:50,000 - Are you coming in? 275 00:11:52,900 --> 00:11:55,800 - You said "Don't leave this room." 276 00:11:56,000 --> 00:11:57,000 - Oh, hi Jo. 277 00:11:57,000 --> 00:11:59,100 - Haven't got an effing clue. 278 00:12:00,100 --> 00:12:01,700 - Right, here's some things that you said: 279 00:12:01,700 --> 00:12:04,400 Doctor, snooker ball. 280 00:12:04,500 --> 00:12:07,500 You said "Welcome to the something", but I'd spoke over you. 281 00:12:08,400 --> 00:12:11,100 - I couldn't remember because all you were saying, it didn't make sense. 282 00:12:11,100 --> 00:12:13,000 - Uhhhhhhhh 283 00:12:13,400 --> 00:12:14,400 A hat. 284 00:12:14,900 --> 00:12:15,700 No. 285 00:12:16,200 --> 00:12:17,400 - What colour was the board? 286 00:12:17,400 --> 00:12:18,500 - Blue? 287 00:12:18,700 --> 00:12:20,800 Right, this board, what colour? - Blue 288 00:12:21,200 --> 00:12:23,300 - Do you know the colour of the board? - What board? 289 00:12:23,400 --> 00:12:25,000 - The wooden board that... 290 00:12:25,200 --> 00:12:27,400 - No, I didn't even know there was one. 291 00:12:27,500 --> 00:12:29,800 - What else was hanging from there, let's just make some stuff up. 292 00:12:29,900 --> 00:12:31,000 A fish? 293 00:12:31,400 --> 00:12:33,800 - A clock. A pig. 294 00:12:34,000 --> 00:12:36,200 - A cricket ball, lemon. 295 00:12:36,300 --> 00:12:40,000 - A bog, a plane, maybe there was like, maybe a small baby. 296 00:12:40,000 --> 00:12:42,100 - I think there was a sort of hairy thing. 297 00:12:42,100 --> 00:12:45,400 It could have been a yeti, or a feather. I don't know. 298 00:12:45,600 --> 00:12:47,000 - You've got one second left. 299 00:12:47,600 --> 00:12:48,700 (Blows whistle) 300 00:12:49,800 --> 00:12:52,000 - "Hello, Ed", you said. 301 00:12:52,400 --> 00:12:53,400 (Blows whistle) 302 00:12:53,800 --> 00:12:57,200 - Not gonna make the Sherlock Holmes society am I? 303 00:12:59,300 --> 00:13:01,100 (Applause) 304 00:13:04,800 --> 00:13:06,600 - What did you think this game was? 305 00:13:07,900 --> 00:13:10,900 - You thought it was "Get to the caravan in exactly two minutes." 306 00:13:11,200 --> 00:13:12,800 So you legged it out of the lab immediately. 307 00:13:12,800 --> 00:13:14,500 - Oh yeah, that's right, I did. I remember now. 308 00:13:14,500 --> 00:13:17,000 - That's why you were pacing around like a tiger outside. 309 00:13:17,100 --> 00:13:20,000 - She was pacing and counting and got in there in one minute 57. 310 00:13:20,400 --> 00:13:22,100 - [Everyone] Whoaaa 311 00:13:23,000 --> 00:13:26,000 - So you would have had five points, if that was the game. 312 00:13:27,500 --> 00:13:29,700 - Well, there's no reason it couldn't be. 313 00:13:29,700 --> 00:13:31,800 - And you did guess one thing correctly by complete chance, 314 00:13:31,800 --> 00:13:33,400 you said feather and there was a feather. 315 00:13:33,400 --> 00:13:34,000 - Wow. 316 00:13:34,000 --> 00:13:37,000 - Amongst your guesses, you also guessed a hat, Mein Kampf, a yeti. 317 00:13:37,400 --> 00:13:39,100 (Laughter) 318 00:13:39,200 --> 00:13:40,800 - Mein Kampf? 319 00:13:41,100 --> 00:13:44,800 - It's an important read for anyone that's interested in democracy. 320 00:13:48,300 --> 00:13:50,700 - We've not done a lot of political satire on this show. 321 00:13:51,100 --> 00:13:52,600 - And we still haven't. 322 00:13:53,200 --> 00:13:56,600 - Rose got one more than Jo. She managed to remember that there was a rope 323 00:13:56,600 --> 00:13:57,900 and that I said "Welcome to the manor". 324 00:13:57,900 --> 00:13:58,900 - 'Cause I love Cluedo. 325 00:13:59,100 --> 00:14:00,400 - Ah! Well there is a link, 326 00:14:00,400 --> 00:14:03,900 you were the only person who spotted, they were all to do with Cluedo. 327 00:14:03,900 --> 00:14:06,400 Gamble got the water pistol, 328 00:14:06,500 --> 00:14:09,100 and also remembered I said doctor and snooker ball. 329 00:14:09,100 --> 00:14:10,200 There's a billiard room of course. 330 00:14:10,400 --> 00:14:11,900 So he got four things right. 331 00:14:11,900 --> 00:14:13,200 - Four things? - So he's, so far, in the lead. 332 00:14:13,200 --> 00:14:16,000 - Aww and he had a little run as fast as he could to a caravan. 333 00:14:17,100 --> 00:14:19,400 Who's next? - I'll show you, here we go. 334 00:14:26,600 --> 00:14:27,500 - Okay. 335 00:14:28,100 --> 00:14:30,300 Oh maybe I have to memorise these. 336 00:14:31,300 --> 00:14:32,700 (Applause) 337 00:14:32,800 --> 00:14:34,400 I'll memorise them just in case. 338 00:14:34,800 --> 00:14:35,900 For a laugh. 339 00:14:40,300 --> 00:14:41,600 (Laughter) 340 00:14:52,100 --> 00:14:53,400 - Hello. - Hi, David. 341 00:14:54,900 --> 00:14:56,400 Welcome to the caravan. - Thank you. 342 00:14:56,500 --> 00:14:57,700 - You got here in time. 343 00:14:58,000 --> 00:15:00,100 - Uh, right. A feather. 344 00:15:00,300 --> 00:15:01,700 - There was an egg, 345 00:15:02,000 --> 00:15:05,100 and there was a pipe and there was a salt shaker. 346 00:15:05,100 --> 00:15:08,100 There was a little, round, red TM thing. 347 00:15:08,400 --> 00:15:10,800 There was a rope tied up, 348 00:15:10,800 --> 00:15:12,400 there was a plastic gun, 349 00:15:12,400 --> 00:15:15,400 there was a peacock feather, and there was a pen knife. 350 00:15:15,400 --> 00:15:16,900 - An empty salt cellar, 351 00:15:17,100 --> 00:15:18,100 a gun. 352 00:15:18,700 --> 00:15:20,400 The wooden board was red. 353 00:15:21,100 --> 00:15:23,000 You said balls. 354 00:15:24,100 --> 00:15:26,700 - You said that I look very nice, you said hello. 355 00:15:26,800 --> 00:15:29,300 You said something like books and... 356 00:15:30,000 --> 00:15:32,500 I didn't take it in. That's the headline. 357 00:15:35,000 --> 00:15:36,800 - I stood there knowing that this would happen. 358 00:15:36,800 --> 00:15:38,500 - Hmm. - Can I go back? 359 00:15:39,900 --> 00:15:41,500 - No. - Okay. 360 00:15:41,800 --> 00:15:44,500 - The colour of the wooden board in the lab. 361 00:15:45,000 --> 00:15:47,200 It was the colour of wood? 362 00:15:47,300 --> 00:15:48,400 - Brown? - Brown 363 00:15:48,500 --> 00:15:49,900 - Or maybe it was white. 364 00:15:49,900 --> 00:15:52,700 - See, now what's happening is, I'm seeing things in here, 365 00:15:52,800 --> 00:15:54,300 and I want to say them. 366 00:15:54,700 --> 00:15:57,500 I want to say lobster, skull, pineapple. 367 00:15:57,500 --> 00:15:58,600 - But you are saying them. 368 00:15:58,600 --> 00:16:00,600 - Because those are the things in here. 369 00:16:00,900 --> 00:16:02,700 - Yeah, okay. 370 00:16:03,100 --> 00:16:05,400 I'm done, I'm not a perfectionist. 371 00:16:07,600 --> 00:16:08,400 (Blows whistle) 372 00:16:09,900 --> 00:16:11,100 - Thank you, Katy. - Thanks. 373 00:16:12,800 --> 00:16:15,700 - I really feel I should have done better. 374 00:16:22,200 --> 00:16:24,300 (Laughter) 375 00:16:26,000 --> 00:16:27,800 (Applause) 376 00:16:33,900 --> 00:16:36,000 - So pleased with yourself, aren't you? 377 00:16:37,200 --> 00:16:39,100 - Always turn over the exam. 378 00:16:39,400 --> 00:16:41,000 Might be a question on the back. 379 00:16:41,300 --> 00:16:43,500 - Um, I mean you've got to be pleased. 380 00:16:43,500 --> 00:16:46,600 - I just had a feeling. I mean I've seen the show before. 381 00:16:48,000 --> 00:16:49,800 It seemed like the sort of think you'd have to do. 382 00:16:49,800 --> 00:16:52,800 - You see, when David looked back at the objects 383 00:16:52,800 --> 00:16:54,400 for that few beats, 384 00:16:54,400 --> 00:16:56,400 I didn't know whether he was memorising them, 385 00:16:56,400 --> 00:16:59,500 or whether he was genuinely baffled by the movement. 386 00:16:59,800 --> 00:17:02,800 - I do do memory palace, does anyone do that? Do anyone know what I'm talking about? 387 00:17:03,300 --> 00:17:06,200 I was trying to do that, but I couldn't remember how to do it. 388 00:17:08,100 --> 00:17:08,900 It's true. 389 00:17:09,000 --> 00:17:10,600 - Look, let's get some points going up. 390 00:17:10,600 --> 00:17:12,400 - Well, Jo did come last in that one. 391 00:17:12,400 --> 00:17:13,900 Then it was Rose, then Ed, then David. 392 00:17:13,900 --> 00:17:16,100 Katy only didn't get Colonel Mustard or Professor Plum, 393 00:17:16,100 --> 00:17:17,700 and she gets the full five points. 394 00:17:17,900 --> 00:17:19,800 (Applause) 395 00:17:20,400 --> 00:17:22,100 - Let us have a score board. 396 00:17:22,100 --> 00:17:25,500 - Okay, we have joint leaders at this stage and they are: 397 00:17:25,500 --> 00:17:26,800 David Baddiel and Katy Wix. 398 00:17:27,000 --> 00:17:29,100 (Applause) 399 00:17:31,700 --> 00:17:34,500 - Then you shall give me a new task immediately. 400 00:17:34,600 --> 00:17:38,500 - Of course. And here we have a spot of outdoor creativity. 401 00:17:38,600 --> 00:17:39,500 Here we go. 402 00:17:40,800 --> 00:17:43,400 (Taskmaster task music) 403 00:17:51,000 --> 00:17:52,600 Hello, Jo. - Hi Alex. 404 00:17:52,900 --> 00:17:54,400 - Bit like Jurassic Park. - Careful. 405 00:17:54,400 --> 00:17:55,900 - Ooh, watch out. 406 00:17:57,700 --> 00:17:59,700 - "Build the most robust statue, 407 00:17:59,700 --> 00:18:01,600 of the most delicate thing." 408 00:18:01,700 --> 00:18:05,600 - "Using the materials provided and place it on--" Oops. 409 00:18:05,700 --> 00:18:07,000 "--the red cross." 410 00:18:07,000 --> 00:18:09,600 - "Your delicate thing must be recognisable, 411 00:18:09,600 --> 00:18:11,700 on the red cross an hour after you finish." 412 00:18:11,700 --> 00:18:15,000 - "And should leave you feeling enormously proud of your creation. 413 00:18:15,700 --> 00:18:16,800 You have 15 minutes." 414 00:18:16,800 --> 00:18:18,400 - Final line please, Katy. 415 00:18:18,500 --> 00:18:20,700 - Oh, "Your time starts now." 416 00:18:22,200 --> 00:18:23,900 (Sighs) Okay. 417 00:18:24,600 --> 00:18:26,000 Here we are again. 418 00:18:26,000 --> 00:18:29,100 - Feelings are delicate, aren't they? The male ego. 419 00:18:29,100 --> 00:18:31,600 But how do I represent that in a robust statue? 420 00:18:31,600 --> 00:18:32,700 - Egg boxes. 421 00:18:32,700 --> 00:18:36,200 - I'm just wondering whether I can convince him that I'm delicate. 422 00:18:37,400 --> 00:18:39,300 (Applause) 423 00:18:41,900 --> 00:18:44,000 - Yeah, seems like we should just get on with this. 424 00:18:44,500 --> 00:18:46,100 There's some delicate stuff for us to see. 425 00:18:46,100 --> 00:18:48,500 - Delicate but robust. Here we go. 426 00:18:49,100 --> 00:18:51,300 - I was gonna say my ego, 427 00:18:51,600 --> 00:18:53,400 except I have a very robust ego. 428 00:18:56,900 --> 00:18:58,900 - What's a delicate thing? A leaf? 429 00:18:59,100 --> 00:19:00,700 - This is pretty delicate. 430 00:19:03,600 --> 00:19:06,800 - There have been times in my life when it's been delicate, my ego. 431 00:19:11,100 --> 00:19:14,700 I was 15, I think and it took me ages to ask Avril Cowen, 432 00:19:14,700 --> 00:19:17,400 who was a very beautiful Scottish young woman. 433 00:19:17,400 --> 00:19:20,000 And she said "I wish you hadn't asked me that." 434 00:19:20,900 --> 00:19:22,300 - Looking like a leaf? 435 00:19:22,300 --> 00:19:23,400 - Does it look like? Yeah. 436 00:19:23,400 --> 00:19:25,300 - Oh no, it's on the fucking thing. 437 00:19:26,100 --> 00:19:29,700 - No! I nailed it to the damn table! 438 00:19:31,400 --> 00:19:33,400 - That's Avril. - You said she was beautiful. 439 00:19:37,900 --> 00:19:40,500 - (Laughs) What is that? 440 00:19:42,800 --> 00:19:44,000 - She nearly done? 441 00:19:44,000 --> 00:19:45,400 - I think so. 442 00:19:48,100 --> 00:19:50,200 - There you go. - Okay, thank you David. (Blows whistle) 443 00:19:50,400 --> 00:19:52,400 - Has it got to be there in an hour? 444 00:19:52,400 --> 00:19:54,500 - Yes. Thanks Jo. (Blows whistle) 445 00:19:54,700 --> 00:19:55,800 Thank you Rose. 446 00:19:56,500 --> 00:19:57,500 - (Sighs) 447 00:19:57,900 --> 00:19:59,600 - How do you feel about your creation? 448 00:19:59,900 --> 00:20:01,600 - Yeah, it's okay. 449 00:20:02,200 --> 00:20:05,800 Oh, sorry. I'm feeling enormously proud of my creation. 450 00:20:06,000 --> 00:20:08,000 (Applause) 451 00:20:10,300 --> 00:20:12,300 - What did Avril Cowen mean by that? 452 00:20:12,300 --> 00:20:15,600 - Well, it was a youth camp and for some reason, 453 00:20:15,700 --> 00:20:18,600 if you wanted to get off with a girl, 454 00:20:18,700 --> 00:20:20,700 you had this slightly formal thing you had to do 455 00:20:20,700 --> 00:20:23,800 which was to say to them "will you go with me?". 456 00:20:23,800 --> 00:20:25,400 - Would you go with me?! 457 00:20:25,600 --> 00:20:27,800 Did you grow up in 1920s Chicago? 458 00:20:28,800 --> 00:20:30,400 - Would you go with me? 459 00:20:31,400 --> 00:20:33,700 - It's 15 year old David Baddiel. 460 00:20:36,100 --> 00:20:39,200 - Is that a fair representation of you Jo? Do you like poetry? 461 00:20:39,400 --> 00:20:40,200 - Yeah. 462 00:20:41,800 --> 00:20:43,800 - Do you wanna bang one out for us? 463 00:20:45,900 --> 00:20:48,400 - Do I want to bang out a poem for you? 464 00:20:48,400 --> 00:20:50,000 I'll have a go. - Here we go. 465 00:20:50,200 --> 00:20:52,600 - I'm gonna miss out some of the words because I can't remember them. 466 00:20:52,700 --> 00:20:53,800 - That's okay. 467 00:20:55,300 --> 00:20:56,900 - And that's all of them. 468 00:20:58,200 --> 00:21:00,300 (Applause) 469 00:21:00,900 --> 00:21:02,900 - Rose, what the fuck was your thing? 470 00:21:03,900 --> 00:21:05,500 - I think the work speaks for itself. 471 00:21:05,500 --> 00:21:08,200 - It's the least delicate thing of all time, but what was it supposed to be? 472 00:21:08,300 --> 00:21:10,800 - The leaf. - Oh what a beautiful leaf. 473 00:21:12,700 --> 00:21:14,800 - Look, I'm sorry but we have to stop again. 474 00:21:14,800 --> 00:21:16,200 More action soon, 475 00:21:16,300 --> 00:21:18,700 followed by a new task, a live task 476 00:21:18,800 --> 00:21:21,400 and then Katy Wix's prize dong. 477 00:21:21,400 --> 00:21:23,200 Okay? Bye! 478 00:21:23,300 --> 00:21:25,300 (Applause) 479 00:21:29,700 --> 00:21:31,700 (Applause) 480 00:21:33,800 --> 00:21:35,000 Hello! 481 00:21:35,100 --> 00:21:37,200 Welcome back to Taskmaster. 482 00:21:37,500 --> 00:21:40,800 - Yes, and I'd just like to take a moment to say thank you 483 00:21:40,900 --> 00:21:42,700 using The Taskmaster's voice. 484 00:21:42,800 --> 00:21:44,300 (Greg's voice) Thank you. 485 00:21:45,400 --> 00:21:48,400 Before the break, we saw some lovely, very personal sculptures. 486 00:21:48,500 --> 00:21:50,300 Do you want to see how they looked after an hour? 487 00:21:50,400 --> 00:21:53,100 - Yeah, and then I want you to go with me. 488 00:21:53,300 --> 00:21:54,800 (Laughter) 489 00:22:01,600 --> 00:22:03,600 - Hello, Jo. - Hi Alex. 490 00:22:03,900 --> 00:22:05,300 - Wanna have a seat? 491 00:22:05,400 --> 00:22:07,000 - What, on this thing? 492 00:22:07,100 --> 00:22:08,300 Ohh, okay. 493 00:22:08,300 --> 00:22:10,500 - Hello. - Oh hello, Rose. Have a seat. 494 00:22:10,500 --> 00:22:11,300 - Okay. 495 00:22:11,300 --> 00:22:13,400 - "Score a goal with this football." 496 00:22:13,600 --> 00:22:16,700 - "Your time starts when Alex blows his whistle." 497 00:22:16,700 --> 00:22:19,000 - Understand the rules? - Yeah, I've got to score a goal. 498 00:22:19,100 --> 00:22:21,500 And is there a goalie? Yeah, a sort of goalie. 499 00:22:21,700 --> 00:22:23,900 Oh no that's my-, that's my statue. 500 00:22:23,900 --> 00:22:25,400 - Oh that's right in the way, yeah. 501 00:22:26,000 --> 00:22:26,900 Good luck. 502 00:22:26,900 --> 00:22:29,000 - Oh, I wish you hadn't done that, that's mean. 503 00:22:29,100 --> 00:22:30,900 - Good luck. Your time starts (Blows whistle). 504 00:22:31,700 --> 00:22:32,800 - Oh my God. 505 00:22:38,200 --> 00:22:40,000 (Laughter) 506 00:22:43,500 --> 00:22:44,900 - See the football... 507 00:22:45,600 --> 00:22:47,200 - Where's the ball gone? 508 00:22:50,300 --> 00:22:51,500 - Coming! 509 00:22:51,600 --> 00:22:52,600 - Thank you. 510 00:22:53,400 --> 00:22:54,200 - Ahh! 511 00:22:55,800 --> 00:22:56,800 - Ahhhh! 512 00:22:57,000 --> 00:22:58,600 - Whaaaa Alex! 513 00:22:58,800 --> 00:23:00,900 - Coming. Ooh, you're close. 514 00:23:01,400 --> 00:23:03,900 - Am I supposed to squash my thing? - Oh! 515 00:23:11,100 --> 00:23:12,700 - Yeah, that'll do. 516 00:23:12,700 --> 00:23:14,100 - Come on, come on. 517 00:23:17,300 --> 00:23:18,900 Goal! 518 00:23:19,000 --> 00:23:20,100 - Stop the clock. 519 00:23:20,300 --> 00:23:22,700 - Bye, Jo! Bye! 520 00:23:26,100 --> 00:23:28,500 (Blows whistle) - That's a goal. 521 00:23:32,800 --> 00:23:35,200 - I'm sorry Avril. You should have said yes. 522 00:23:35,400 --> 00:23:37,800 (Audience laughter) 523 00:23:38,800 --> 00:23:41,200 Now I've destroyed the statue, I haven't even scored. 524 00:23:41,300 --> 00:23:43,900 For the second time in 40 years. 525 00:23:45,000 --> 00:23:47,100 And it's a goal! 526 00:23:47,200 --> 00:23:48,100 (Whistle blows) 527 00:23:48,100 --> 00:23:49,700 - It's a nice clean cut. 528 00:23:49,700 --> 00:23:52,400 - Lovely. How's your statue? 529 00:23:52,400 --> 00:23:55,600 - Quite a lot thinner, which is something for me to work towards. 530 00:23:56,700 --> 00:23:58,600 (Applause) 531 00:23:59,400 --> 00:24:03,000 - I found it genuinely heartbreaking, when mini Jo got crushed. 532 00:24:03,200 --> 00:24:05,200 - You're on your own there, I recon. 533 00:24:05,900 --> 00:24:09,400 - You knew that was important to me, psychologically, that statue. 534 00:24:10,400 --> 00:24:13,200 - Maybe we've helped you both exercise a ghost, in a way. 535 00:24:13,200 --> 00:24:16,100 Maybe you don't have to listen to rubbish old poetry anymore. 536 00:24:16,200 --> 00:24:18,200 And maybe you can let that woman go. 537 00:24:18,300 --> 00:24:20,100 - That's how 1920s David Baddiel 538 00:24:20,100 --> 00:24:22,500 would have like, dispatched of Avril as well. 539 00:24:23,200 --> 00:24:26,700 If you don't go out with me, you're going to find yourself on the underside of a roller, baby. 540 00:24:27,000 --> 00:24:29,000 (Laughter) 541 00:24:30,300 --> 00:24:32,100 Flat as a pancake, see. 542 00:24:33,800 --> 00:24:35,700 - Katy, I would argue that 543 00:24:35,700 --> 00:24:37,900 the roller has enhanced your beautiful thing. 544 00:24:37,900 --> 00:24:40,400 - I had a fucking horrible time on it. 545 00:24:41,500 --> 00:24:43,600 Didn't even see the delicate thing, I had no sense. 546 00:24:43,700 --> 00:24:45,200 I was just trying to survive. 547 00:24:45,200 --> 00:24:46,900 - But it was a miraculous slice of the thing, 548 00:24:46,900 --> 00:24:48,800 and you were one of the quickest driving. 549 00:24:48,800 --> 00:24:50,100 - Amazing. I don't know how that happened. 550 00:24:50,100 --> 00:24:52,800 - Rose, that leaf was enormous. 551 00:24:52,800 --> 00:24:56,000 And the fact that you are the only one so far, to totally miss it, 552 00:24:56,100 --> 00:24:58,200 with a roller, and score a goal. 553 00:24:58,800 --> 00:25:00,200 It was unbelievable. 554 00:25:00,200 --> 00:25:01,800 - Yeah, God intervened. 555 00:25:02,100 --> 00:25:04,800 - David was the slowest, he took 15 minutes and 20 seconds. 556 00:25:04,800 --> 00:25:07,200 He was travelling at five miles per day. 557 00:25:08,800 --> 00:25:10,900 Then Katy with 11, Jo with eight minutes. 558 00:25:10,900 --> 00:25:13,900 Rose, four minutes 45, just straight down there. 559 00:25:14,100 --> 00:25:15,500 One more to see. 560 00:25:15,700 --> 00:25:17,400 Do you want to see why we've kept Ed till last? 561 00:25:17,400 --> 00:25:19,100 - Oh, no. - Yes please. 562 00:25:19,100 --> 00:25:20,300 - Okay, here we go. 563 00:25:20,500 --> 00:25:22,200 - I'm just gonna have to do-- 564 00:25:22,300 --> 00:25:24,700 Not a flower Ed, think of something better than that. 565 00:25:24,700 --> 00:25:26,700 (Sings) A little baby! 566 00:25:27,000 --> 00:25:29,000 (Audience laughter) 567 00:25:30,200 --> 00:25:30,900 Head! 568 00:25:31,100 --> 00:25:32,800 Ooohh sausage legs. 569 00:25:34,600 --> 00:25:38,000 This is just a general broadcast question, is it weird if I do the baby's nipples? 570 00:25:40,200 --> 00:25:41,400 Belly button. 571 00:25:45,300 --> 00:25:47,900 - Have you finished, Ed? - Oh God, I think I have. 572 00:25:49,300 --> 00:25:50,400 - Ed please have a seat. 573 00:25:53,100 --> 00:25:55,000 - "Score a goal with this football. 574 00:25:56,200 --> 00:25:58,400 Thank you. - Your time starts (Blows whistle). 575 00:26:00,300 --> 00:26:01,700 - There we go. 576 00:26:04,700 --> 00:26:05,900 Here we go! 577 00:26:16,100 --> 00:26:17,900 - The whole ball has to go across. 578 00:26:19,500 --> 00:26:20,800 - Oh no! 579 00:26:26,300 --> 00:26:28,700 I think we all know what's going to happen now, don't we. 580 00:26:42,900 --> 00:26:43,900 - Good goal, Ed. 581 00:26:46,500 --> 00:26:47,900 What's it meant to be? 582 00:26:48,100 --> 00:26:49,100 - Baby. 583 00:26:51,200 --> 00:26:53,100 Sorry, there's some there as well. 584 00:26:53,200 --> 00:26:55,000 - Thanks, Ed. - I mean... 585 00:26:55,500 --> 00:26:58,600 If I'd known in advance, I wouldn't have made a baby. 586 00:26:58,800 --> 00:27:00,700 (Applause) 587 00:27:03,600 --> 00:27:06,900 - I don't know why it's made worse, by the fact that the baby had nipples. 588 00:27:07,100 --> 00:27:08,600 (Laughter) 589 00:27:09,500 --> 00:27:10,800 - And it was crucified. 590 00:27:11,500 --> 00:27:13,200 - I put it on the board for stability-- 591 00:27:13,200 --> 00:27:14,200 - You crucified it. 592 00:27:15,200 --> 00:27:16,500 - You've clearly crucified it. 593 00:27:16,700 --> 00:27:18,900 And then you mimed it's crucifixion. 594 00:27:20,100 --> 00:27:21,900 So you thought it was the baby Jesus, 595 00:27:21,900 --> 00:27:24,500 and that Jesus was crucified as a baby? 596 00:27:26,000 --> 00:27:27,600 You need to reread the book. 597 00:27:28,500 --> 00:27:31,800 - If I'm to take the word 'robust' literally, 598 00:27:31,900 --> 00:27:35,000 we have to look at David and Ed's and say 599 00:27:35,000 --> 00:27:36,700 that's just a pile of mush. 600 00:27:36,800 --> 00:27:38,900 I'm gonna give them both two points. 601 00:27:38,900 --> 00:27:41,600 There was one strand of Jo's hair left. 602 00:27:41,700 --> 00:27:44,800 And that gets her an extra point, three points. 603 00:27:44,900 --> 00:27:47,800 Despite it being one of the worst things ever made, 604 00:27:47,800 --> 00:27:50,400 on nine series of this show, 605 00:27:50,400 --> 00:27:53,900 Rose's thing was robust and intact, so I'm gonna give her four points. 606 00:27:54,400 --> 00:27:57,500 And clearly, Katy's beautiful cross section 607 00:27:57,500 --> 00:27:59,800 of a delicate leaf, takes home the big five. 608 00:28:01,500 --> 00:28:04,200 - Well, David got a total of three, very low. 609 00:28:04,200 --> 00:28:06,900 Ed, five. Jo and Katy both got seven points. 610 00:28:07,000 --> 00:28:09,900 Rose got nine points on that task, so well done Rose Matafeo. 611 00:28:10,000 --> 00:28:12,000 (Applause) 612 00:28:12,500 --> 00:28:13,900 - Please can I see another task? 613 00:28:13,900 --> 00:28:17,100 - Yes you may, Greg. Get ready, here comes the task. 614 00:28:17,600 --> 00:28:19,700 (Taskmaster task music) 615 00:28:28,900 --> 00:28:30,600 Hello, Ed. How are you? 616 00:28:30,900 --> 00:28:32,200 - Good, oh. 617 00:28:34,000 --> 00:28:35,000 Oh no. 618 00:28:40,600 --> 00:28:42,700 - Oh hello. Ohh. 619 00:28:48,000 --> 00:28:49,400 - Oh, what? What? 620 00:28:49,500 --> 00:28:51,600 (Laughs) Sneaky. 621 00:28:51,700 --> 00:28:54,200 - "Break something into the most parts, 622 00:28:54,200 --> 00:28:56,000 and completely fix it." 623 00:28:56,200 --> 00:28:59,600 - "You have five minutes to select your item, 624 00:28:59,600 --> 00:29:01,300 three minutes to break it." 625 00:29:01,700 --> 00:29:03,700 - "And seven minutes to fix it." 626 00:29:03,900 --> 00:29:05,500 What, anything? - Uh huh. 627 00:29:05,600 --> 00:29:07,500 - "Time starts now." - Thank you. 628 00:29:07,700 --> 00:29:10,500 - Oh, the thing is, I'm very good at breaking 629 00:29:10,600 --> 00:29:12,300 but awful at fixing. 630 00:29:13,700 --> 00:29:16,400 - What can I break, what you gonna allow me to break? 631 00:29:16,600 --> 00:29:19,800 - I feel pretty broken, but I don't think I could fix myself 632 00:29:20,400 --> 00:29:21,700 in seven minutes. 633 00:29:22,000 --> 00:29:23,700 - Has anyone got a car here? 634 00:29:25,600 --> 00:29:27,000 - Yes, I've got a car here. 635 00:29:27,200 --> 00:29:28,800 - Should I have a go at your engine? 636 00:29:29,700 --> 00:29:32,400 - I'm committed to this show, but if I was to say my leg... 637 00:29:33,300 --> 00:29:35,500 That would be stupid wouldn't it? 638 00:29:36,000 --> 00:29:37,800 (Applause) 639 00:29:39,800 --> 00:29:43,300 - How long did you give David to mend his shattered leg? 640 00:29:44,200 --> 00:29:46,300 - Seven minutes. - Seven minutes. 641 00:29:46,400 --> 00:29:49,000 I mean we had the full range there, didn't we. 642 00:29:49,100 --> 00:29:50,900 Katy breaking our heart, 643 00:29:50,900 --> 00:29:54,300 Ed like a moronic child going "I'm gonna take an engine to pieces." 644 00:29:55,700 --> 00:29:59,000 - Okay, well we're hoping you'll learn something from this video because it's 645 00:30:00,200 --> 00:30:01,700 Ed, Jo, Katy 646 00:30:02,100 --> 00:30:03,600 - Get out. - Educate-y. 647 00:30:04,600 --> 00:30:06,000 - Get out! - Really? 648 00:30:07,400 --> 00:30:10,600 - What I'm thinking is like, a massive bar of chocolate. 649 00:30:10,900 --> 00:30:12,300 - So that's possible. 650 00:30:12,400 --> 00:30:15,600 - And you can just break it into like, loads of pieces. 651 00:30:15,700 --> 00:30:18,900 - I'm gonna break up the bread, and then squish it back together. 652 00:30:19,200 --> 00:30:21,000 - Right, this is the other option. 653 00:30:23,300 --> 00:30:24,500 - Okay, your three minutes starts now. 654 00:30:28,800 --> 00:30:31,100 - I'm going to have to push grapes back onto the stalk. 655 00:30:31,100 --> 00:30:32,700 No one's ever had to do that. 656 00:30:32,900 --> 00:30:34,900 - Fuck. How'd that go? 657 00:30:38,000 --> 00:30:39,700 - This is absolutely insane. 658 00:30:39,800 --> 00:30:42,800 - One, two, three, four. 659 00:30:42,900 --> 00:30:47,000 - I was just thinking, actually you could have just broken a jigsaw up, couldn't you? 660 00:30:48,400 --> 00:30:50,900 - It's the completely fix part that I'm really... 661 00:30:51,000 --> 00:30:53,500 (Laughs) Sorry, this is bugging me. 662 00:30:57,000 --> 00:30:59,900 - Why have you done it like this, Ed. You absolute arsehole. 663 00:31:00,600 --> 00:31:03,600 And that is like a jigsaw, I've made a chocolate jigsaw. 664 00:31:07,000 --> 00:31:08,500 What have I done? 665 00:31:08,700 --> 00:31:11,700 Right is there any glue? Is there any glue? 666 00:31:12,200 --> 00:31:13,400 Super glue? 667 00:31:14,000 --> 00:31:16,400 - Okay, right that part's over with. 668 00:31:16,800 --> 00:31:18,900 - That's your three minutes. - Right. 669 00:31:19,200 --> 00:31:22,200 - You have seven minutes to completely fix your slice of bread. 670 00:31:22,300 --> 00:31:24,200 - Brilliant. - Starting now. 671 00:31:25,300 --> 00:31:27,200 - I don't know how I can manage that. 672 00:31:31,600 --> 00:31:33,000 - It's not sticking. 673 00:31:37,200 --> 00:31:39,100 Oh frick off! 674 00:31:42,900 --> 00:31:44,700 The glue's not even been coming out. 675 00:31:46,100 --> 00:31:47,500 - Have you snipped off the top? 676 00:31:47,600 --> 00:31:49,800 - I've been injecting grapes with nothing. 677 00:31:50,200 --> 00:31:51,800 - There's scissors in the kitchen. 678 00:31:53,600 --> 00:31:55,100 - It feels kind of erotic. 679 00:31:59,100 --> 00:32:01,300 - I think that looks really similar. 680 00:32:03,000 --> 00:32:04,900 - This is how it's gonna have to be. 681 00:32:08,700 --> 00:32:10,600 - Doesn't say it has to look the same. 682 00:32:10,600 --> 00:32:12,000 - Good as new. 683 00:32:17,100 --> 00:32:18,500 - Chuck that on there as well. 684 00:32:19,300 --> 00:32:21,400 - (Blows whistle) Thank you, Ed. - Thank you. 685 00:32:21,500 --> 00:32:24,000 - Looks like it's completely fixed. 686 00:32:24,100 --> 00:32:26,800 - (Blows whistle) Please stop fixing you slice of bread. 687 00:32:27,200 --> 00:32:29,400 (Applause) 688 00:32:30,200 --> 00:32:33,400 - Okay, I don't know where to fucking start here. 689 00:32:34,000 --> 00:32:35,900 Jo Brand, straight to the chocolate, 690 00:32:36,000 --> 00:32:37,800 repaired the chocolate using sellotape 691 00:32:37,800 --> 00:32:39,700 - Yeah, and didn't fucking eat it. 692 00:32:41,100 --> 00:32:42,700 - Whoa, I wasn't accusing you. 693 00:32:42,700 --> 00:32:43,900 - Big thing for me. 694 00:32:44,100 --> 00:32:46,900 Just got on with it, like a quiet nerdy fuckwit. 695 00:32:47,000 --> 00:32:48,700 (Laughter) 696 00:32:49,300 --> 00:32:51,300 - Lovely though, you could pick it up afterwards. 697 00:32:51,400 --> 00:32:52,800 - Sort of, yes. 698 00:32:54,100 --> 00:32:56,700 - So let's, let's talk through your slice of bread. 699 00:32:57,200 --> 00:32:59,300 - I mean, you panic don't you. 700 00:33:00,400 --> 00:33:02,400 - You did break them into 220 pieces. 701 00:33:02,400 --> 00:33:03,700 - Well that's pretty good. - You counted them out. 702 00:33:03,700 --> 00:33:05,000 - Were you wetting the bread? 703 00:33:05,000 --> 00:33:07,700 - Yeah, in the moment I thought water would help. 704 00:33:07,800 --> 00:33:09,600 Yeah, like a sort of cement. 705 00:33:09,600 --> 00:33:12,200 I mean it was in one piece, back together at the end. 706 00:33:12,200 --> 00:33:13,800 - You wouldn't be able to pick that bread up would you? 707 00:33:13,800 --> 00:33:15,400 - I think so, with a spatula. 708 00:33:17,300 --> 00:33:18,300 Definitely. 709 00:33:18,500 --> 00:33:19,900 - Was the crust in the middle of the bread? 710 00:33:19,900 --> 00:33:21,100 - Yeah. - Yeah. 711 00:33:23,300 --> 00:33:25,100 - Ed. - Jesus Christ. 712 00:33:26,400 --> 00:33:28,500 - I'd love to try and back it up, 713 00:33:28,500 --> 00:33:30,300 but I lost my mind. 714 00:33:31,500 --> 00:33:33,500 - He broke it in 65 pieces, that's something. - Yeah. 715 00:33:33,500 --> 00:33:36,200 - And it ended up as 65 pieces, covered in glue. 716 00:33:37,000 --> 00:33:37,800 - Okay. 717 00:33:39,200 --> 00:33:42,200 We've one part left until episode three is complete. 718 00:33:42,300 --> 00:33:46,000 But first, I need to have some alone time. Stop looking at me. Bye bye. 719 00:33:46,800 --> 00:33:48,400 (Applause) 720 00:33:51,600 --> 00:33:53,800 (Applause) 721 00:33:55,500 --> 00:33:57,700 Thank you. Nice clapping, great clapping. 722 00:33:57,700 --> 00:34:00,100 It's the last part of the show, there's some serious wood to be won. 723 00:34:00,100 --> 00:34:01,800 But first, there's a task to be completed. 724 00:34:01,800 --> 00:34:03,000 - Oh there sure is. 725 00:34:03,000 --> 00:34:04,300 Hey, guys. Uhh... 726 00:34:04,900 --> 00:34:06,100 If it ain't broke, 727 00:34:06,200 --> 00:34:09,500 break it and then fix it for a potential five points, that's the task. 728 00:34:09,600 --> 00:34:13,100 Quite unexpectedly, three of them tried to break and then fix, food. 729 00:34:14,100 --> 00:34:17,500 We haven't seen Rose yet, or David. So here's Rose and David. 730 00:34:18,000 --> 00:34:19,700 - Well, I was thinking, um 731 00:34:19,900 --> 00:34:23,000 if I got a piece of string, cut it up. 732 00:34:23,200 --> 00:34:26,200 So, I'm breaking it into the most parts, but then tying it together again. 733 00:34:26,200 --> 00:34:28,700 So I'm actually, really I'm fixing it aren't I? 734 00:34:28,900 --> 00:34:31,500 - Hello. - Hello David, I've brought my Broadcast Award for you. 735 00:34:31,700 --> 00:34:34,100 - I've been nominated for numerous awards. 736 00:34:34,200 --> 00:34:36,300 But I've never actually won one. 737 00:34:36,500 --> 00:34:38,500 - So you'd end up still, with one big piece of string. 738 00:34:38,700 --> 00:34:39,700 - Yeah! - Yeah. 739 00:34:40,300 --> 00:34:42,500 - And I think that would be fixing a piece of sting. 740 00:34:42,800 --> 00:34:43,800 - As a result, 741 00:34:43,800 --> 00:34:47,500 I felt I would have a particular energy, in destroying your Broadcast Award. 742 00:34:48,400 --> 00:34:50,500 - Your three minutes, starts now. 743 00:34:53,600 --> 00:34:54,900 Please be careful. 744 00:34:56,600 --> 00:34:58,500 (Laughter) 745 00:35:02,900 --> 00:35:04,500 - Have you got ear plugs? 746 00:35:04,800 --> 00:35:07,600 - You want some ear plugs? - I might deafen myself doing this. 747 00:35:15,300 --> 00:35:17,400 - There's one knot, two knots. 748 00:35:17,800 --> 00:35:21,200 I could do a knot in about 10 seconds, so, what that's... 749 00:35:21,200 --> 00:35:22,700 (laughs) Let's do some math. 750 00:35:22,700 --> 00:35:25,400 That's six, six times seven, 42. So I could do 42 knots. 751 00:35:25,700 --> 00:35:26,800 Could I? 752 00:35:32,100 --> 00:35:33,200 - Have you got any lighter fuel? 753 00:35:33,200 --> 00:35:34,200 - Lighter fluid? - Yeah. 754 00:35:34,200 --> 00:35:35,500 - Have you got a match? 755 00:35:42,300 --> 00:35:43,400 - Oh, I've put it out. 756 00:35:43,600 --> 00:35:45,400 (Audience laughter) 757 00:35:45,600 --> 00:35:48,300 - I think that's enough, I think that's enough. I'm too scared. 758 00:35:48,500 --> 00:35:52,400 - Your seven minutes to fix your string completely, starts now. (Blows whistle) 759 00:35:56,800 --> 00:35:58,700 - Have you got a pen? - What sort of pen? 760 00:35:58,800 --> 00:36:01,000 - A black pen. That doesn't work. 761 00:36:01,200 --> 00:36:03,100 This doesn't write on here. 762 00:36:03,600 --> 00:36:05,200 It just says Broad Arse now. 763 00:36:06,700 --> 00:36:08,500 Do you want a Broad Arse Award? 764 00:36:08,900 --> 00:36:10,200 - Is it a compliment? 765 00:36:10,500 --> 00:36:14,000 - Seems like a challenge that a cursed princess would be made to do. 766 00:36:14,100 --> 00:36:17,200 - Locked in a tower. "Tie the strings together." 767 00:36:26,700 --> 00:36:29,300 - If a job's worth doing, it's worth doing well. 768 00:36:29,300 --> 00:36:31,900 - Just gonna check the integrity. Uh huh. 769 00:36:32,100 --> 00:36:33,200 - Here we go. 770 00:36:33,400 --> 00:36:34,600 - You gonna... - Do what? 771 00:36:34,600 --> 00:36:37,100 - Put it back to how it was completely? Or... 772 00:36:37,300 --> 00:36:40,200 - What do you mean? Oh shit. (laughs) 773 00:36:42,600 --> 00:36:45,100 That doesn't count, that doesn't count. That's gorgeous isn't it. 774 00:36:45,100 --> 00:36:46,200 (Whistle blows) 775 00:36:46,500 --> 00:36:47,900 - Yeah, thanks Rose. 776 00:36:48,600 --> 00:36:50,400 (Applause) 777 00:36:51,200 --> 00:36:54,900 - Tell me, once you'd established that the award was one solid bit of metal, 778 00:36:54,900 --> 00:36:57,800 - Yeah. - What did you think it would add, setting fire-- 779 00:36:58,400 --> 00:36:59,600 --setting fire to it? 780 00:36:59,600 --> 00:37:03,100 - Well, I thought it might melt, and be easier to smash into pieces. 781 00:37:03,100 --> 00:37:05,100 - Oh you thought the lighter fluid would get it to such a heat. 782 00:37:06,300 --> 00:37:09,400 - I thought it would melt and become like molten award, 783 00:37:10,000 --> 00:37:11,400 and then I could smash it more easily. 784 00:37:11,400 --> 00:37:13,500 'Cause I don't know if you noticed, it wasn't smashing. 785 00:37:13,600 --> 00:37:15,500 - Okay let's talk about your fairy tale. 786 00:37:15,500 --> 00:37:18,400 In this fairy tale, does the evil man say you must 787 00:37:18,500 --> 00:37:22,200 um, cut up some string and then make it whole again? 788 00:37:22,200 --> 00:37:24,300 Or did your princess choose to do that? 789 00:37:24,300 --> 00:37:25,900 - Yeah, the princess is probably just a bit bored. 790 00:37:25,900 --> 00:37:28,900 - It strikes me Rose, that if it's a traditional fairy tale, 791 00:37:29,600 --> 00:37:32,200 a handsome prince would come and rescue the princess. 792 00:37:32,300 --> 00:37:33,800 He might get to the top of the tower, 793 00:37:33,900 --> 00:37:37,300 and see that she's spent all her time cutting up string, 794 00:37:37,300 --> 00:37:39,800 and then tying back together again and think: 795 00:37:39,800 --> 00:37:42,200 "Ahhh, she seems.... she seems quite boring to me." 796 00:37:43,400 --> 00:37:45,700 - I'm not gonna get points off for being boring, am I? 797 00:37:45,700 --> 00:37:46,900 - Feels like it. 798 00:37:47,800 --> 00:37:49,900 He set fire to a lump of metal. 799 00:37:50,900 --> 00:37:52,500 - And I'm gonna get no points. 800 00:37:52,600 --> 00:37:55,100 - Okay. - Okay, who do you think broke it and fixed it the worst? 801 00:37:55,100 --> 00:37:58,700 - Who do you think? Obviously Ed lost his mind, he gets one point. 802 00:37:58,700 --> 00:38:01,400 David didn't break anything, he gets two points. 803 00:38:01,400 --> 00:38:04,300 - Right. - Katy, you reformed a bread 804 00:38:04,300 --> 00:38:06,800 but you wouldn't be able to pick it up, so I'm only going to give you three points. 805 00:38:06,800 --> 00:38:09,700 -Okay. - Rose, Rumpelstiltskin, yes. 806 00:38:09,800 --> 00:38:12,700 The princess who tied string together, rubbish. 807 00:38:12,700 --> 00:38:16,200 But I can't deny, it looked like string, I'll give you four points. 808 00:38:16,500 --> 00:38:20,500 And Jo Brand, I mean tick, tick, tick, five points! 809 00:38:20,800 --> 00:38:22,600 (Applause) 810 00:38:22,800 --> 00:38:23,900 - Hurray! 811 00:38:24,000 --> 00:38:25,000 - Scores! 812 00:38:25,000 --> 00:38:27,200 - Ed is in last place with 12 points, 813 00:38:27,200 --> 00:38:30,400 seven points away from the leader so far, which is Katy Wix with 19 points. 814 00:38:30,600 --> 00:38:33,200 (Cheering and applause) 815 00:38:34,800 --> 00:38:36,700 - Right, up you stand please, 816 00:38:36,700 --> 00:38:39,300 make your way to the stage for the final task of the show. 817 00:38:39,800 --> 00:38:41,500 (Applause) 818 00:38:48,900 --> 00:38:50,700 Five great guys in ponchos. 819 00:38:50,800 --> 00:38:52,200 Who's gonna read the task out? 820 00:38:52,300 --> 00:38:54,500 - Uh, Katy Wix is gonna read it out, if that's alright. 821 00:38:54,500 --> 00:38:55,600 - Okay. 822 00:38:56,400 --> 00:38:59,400 "Wearing your blindfold correctly at all times, 823 00:38:59,500 --> 00:39:01,600 "fill a pint glass with water. 824 00:39:01,800 --> 00:39:04,200 "If you make a big mess you are disqualified. 825 00:39:04,400 --> 00:39:07,600 "Closest to a pint of water, wins. You have three minutes." 826 00:39:07,600 --> 00:39:08,900 - Can I piss in it? 827 00:39:10,000 --> 00:39:11,600 - That wouldn't be water, David would it? It would be piss. 828 00:39:11,600 --> 00:39:12,700 - It would be mainly water. 829 00:39:12,900 --> 00:39:14,400 - Well yes, yes you can. 830 00:39:15,600 --> 00:39:17,200 Is everyone ready to put their blindfolds on? 831 00:39:17,200 --> 00:39:18,800 - Yeah, go one then. - Pop them down. 832 00:39:19,000 --> 00:39:20,800 - Just gonna take off your red cloak. 833 00:39:20,800 --> 00:39:21,600 - Thank you. 834 00:39:23,100 --> 00:39:25,100 - Okay. - Is this water? 835 00:39:25,800 --> 00:39:28,600 - I feel like I'm in a terrible Slipknot tribute act. 836 00:39:29,300 --> 00:39:30,800 - Is it water in here? 837 00:39:31,000 --> 00:39:33,500 - You've got three minutes to make a pint of water. 838 00:39:33,600 --> 00:39:35,400 Your time starts (blows whistle) 839 00:39:37,300 --> 00:39:38,800 - How do you get the-- Oh, the lid. 840 00:39:42,300 --> 00:39:43,400 That's water. 841 00:39:43,700 --> 00:39:45,200 - I don't understand. 842 00:39:45,200 --> 00:39:46,300 - What don't you understand, Katy? 843 00:39:46,300 --> 00:39:48,000 - I don't know, all of it. 844 00:39:51,000 --> 00:39:53,100 - Is this all water? - Is it all water? 845 00:39:53,100 --> 00:39:55,000 - These are all valid questions. 846 00:39:55,200 --> 00:39:56,500 - Is it blood? 847 00:39:56,500 --> 00:39:58,200 - Okay, I'm gonna drink some of this. 848 00:39:59,400 --> 00:40:01,400 - Ahh! What is that? 849 00:40:02,900 --> 00:40:04,600 - Ahhh! Ahhh! 850 00:40:05,300 --> 00:40:06,500 - What is that? 851 00:40:09,300 --> 00:40:11,000 - Shit. - That is Marmite. 852 00:40:12,400 --> 00:40:14,500 - If you make a big mess you will me disqualified. 853 00:40:14,700 --> 00:40:16,100 - That's water. 854 00:40:19,900 --> 00:40:21,700 - That felt like a rat. 855 00:40:22,800 --> 00:40:24,200 - I don't know what that is. 856 00:40:24,700 --> 00:40:26,300 Smells medical. 857 00:40:26,700 --> 00:40:28,300 - Oh, that's not water. 858 00:40:28,500 --> 00:40:29,500 - Very focused at the end. 859 00:40:29,500 --> 00:40:30,900 - Very focused. - Very good. 860 00:40:31,000 --> 00:40:32,400 - Oh that's water. 861 00:40:34,800 --> 00:40:37,400 - Whaaa! That was fucking sand! 862 00:40:41,100 --> 00:40:43,300 - I should say yeah, don't-- don't drink the sand. 863 00:40:43,300 --> 00:40:45,300 - That's not-- that's not water. 864 00:40:46,700 --> 00:40:48,900 - What the heck is that? 865 00:40:50,100 --> 00:40:52,500 - Oh hang on, that doesn't shake. 866 00:40:56,500 --> 00:40:58,100 - Oh vinegar! 867 00:40:58,600 --> 00:41:00,700 - Eight seconds left. - That's vinegar as well. 868 00:41:01,400 --> 00:41:04,100 - Five, four, three, 869 00:41:04,700 --> 00:41:07,100 two, one. (Blows whistle) 870 00:41:07,100 --> 00:41:09,200 (Applause) 871 00:41:12,000 --> 00:41:15,000 - I just realised, I had my eyes shut for the whole thing. 872 00:41:15,900 --> 00:41:17,000 - How did you do that? 873 00:41:17,100 --> 00:41:18,900 - Heeyyyyy! 874 00:41:20,000 --> 00:41:22,100 - It's like a body builder's breakfast. 875 00:41:22,800 --> 00:41:25,300 - Hey, I've got an idea, we'll analyse the pints, 876 00:41:25,300 --> 00:41:27,800 we'll tot up the points, we'll end with the final score. 877 00:41:27,900 --> 00:41:30,200 And why don't you all come down here and join me. 878 00:41:31,500 --> 00:41:33,900 (Cheering and applause) 879 00:41:37,100 --> 00:41:39,000 Well, that was all very exciting wasn't it? 880 00:41:39,100 --> 00:41:40,800 - It was, and I've analysed the pints. 881 00:41:40,800 --> 00:41:42,600 - Ohh here we go. So you can distribute the points. 882 00:41:42,700 --> 00:41:43,900 Pints look like-- 883 00:41:45,500 --> 00:41:48,500 - Some of them look like pure, pure water though, but were they? 884 00:41:48,500 --> 00:41:51,600 - Well, I can tell you at either end you've got David and Rose, 885 00:41:51,600 --> 00:41:54,700 who amazingly put the same amount of water and vinegar in theirs. 886 00:41:55,600 --> 00:41:57,100 Ed is very nearly a pint. 887 00:41:57,200 --> 00:41:59,300 He also put one thing of vinegar in. 888 00:41:59,300 --> 00:42:00,600 - Did I? - Yes you did. 889 00:42:00,900 --> 00:42:03,700 - Katy only put a little bit of water in, seven test tubes. 890 00:42:03,700 --> 00:42:05,100 But it is just water. 891 00:42:05,100 --> 00:42:09,000 And then Jo, water, egg, vinegar and two jars of cotton wool. 892 00:42:09,400 --> 00:42:10,800 (Laughter) 893 00:42:11,100 --> 00:42:12,700 Closest to a pint is Ed's. 894 00:42:12,700 --> 00:42:14,900 - Is Ed Gamble and he only popped one vinegar in. 895 00:42:14,900 --> 00:42:17,200 Well he's a clear five pointer. - Okay, five points to Ed Gamble. 896 00:42:19,000 --> 00:42:20,900 Then we've got Katy with pure water, 897 00:42:20,900 --> 00:42:23,100 David and Rose is 10 parts water, one part vinegar. 898 00:42:23,100 --> 00:42:26,200 - Right, okay well we have to recognise pure water. 899 00:42:26,200 --> 00:42:27,900 - And respect it. - And respect it. 900 00:42:27,900 --> 00:42:30,000 - That's what Katherine means, it means pure. 901 00:42:30,100 --> 00:42:31,900 - Hey, four points. 902 00:42:32,600 --> 00:42:34,200 - You're putting Katy in second place. 903 00:42:34,200 --> 00:42:35,700 - I'm putting Katy in second place. 904 00:42:36,300 --> 00:42:38,900 Well I think you know where this is going, David and Rose, 905 00:42:39,100 --> 00:42:40,600 - Joint third. - Joint third. 906 00:42:40,600 --> 00:42:42,600 - And one point to Jo Brand. - Jo Brand! 907 00:42:42,700 --> 00:42:44,400 (Applause) 908 00:42:44,800 --> 00:42:47,100 - Shall I give you the final scoreboard for this episode? 909 00:42:47,100 --> 00:42:50,200 - Yes! - Okay, well Jo did end up on last place with 15. 910 00:42:50,200 --> 00:42:53,400 And the winner of this episode with 23 points, was Katy Wix! 911 00:42:53,600 --> 00:42:56,200 (Cheering and applause) 912 00:42:56,600 --> 00:42:58,900 - Katy Wix wins episode three. 913 00:42:58,900 --> 00:43:01,900 Please go and wave around your winner's wood. 914 00:43:02,500 --> 00:43:04,700 (Applause) 915 00:43:05,800 --> 00:43:07,600 What have we learned today? 916 00:43:07,600 --> 00:43:10,300 We've learned that you've got a busy life, full of stress, 917 00:43:10,400 --> 00:43:12,400 deadlines and bills to be paid. 918 00:43:12,400 --> 00:43:14,300 Try and remember, that at the end of the day 919 00:43:14,300 --> 00:43:17,400 life is just injecting grapes with nothing. 920 00:43:17,500 --> 00:43:19,100 Thank you everybody for watching. 921 00:43:19,100 --> 00:43:23,000 And let's here it again for tonight's winner, Katy Wix! 922 00:43:23,100 --> 00:43:25,700 (Cheering and applause)